Sunday, April 17, 2005

Chili Today/Hot Tamale Volume II

Written 10-23-03. A blast from the past. I like the trivia and here's my challenge. Submitted for your perusal and approval:

Brought to you this week by v.c., subbing for Alan Smithee, who is currently engaged with his gig at Cat's Potpurri in N'awlins. Alan's recreation of the Elvis phenomena has been a huge suckcess. Alan secretly confided in me that his set includes "I Got Stung," "In the Ghetto," and "Heartbreak Hotel."

Without further pomp and circumstance, here's yet another edition of the Alan Smithee Trivia Challenge. Here goes!

1) What is R juice?

a) a last-ditch attempt to save the company by Ronnie, before he embraced change. Selling for $.99 and appearing with his likeness on the bottle, R juice, a cornucopia of fruits, was to be sold at Pic's everywhere in the USA.
b) Short for Rowdy juice. Invented by v.c. and to be sold only to kids.
c) another idea stolen from v.c. Another entry into the cola wars.
d) au jus

2) The song, < "It's Only The > Beginning," was written by

a) Chicago Transit Authority
b) Curly Joe Howard
c) Count Lippe
d) Jack MacGregor

3) Who has repeated this phrase the most often? < source Guiness Book of World Records > 10-12 pound turkey, two quarts of dressing, a quart of giblet gravy, and a pint of frozen, er, cranberry sauce!

a) hootsbuddie
b) pictruandtru
c) clifhenry
d) alansmithee

4) Hoots has introduced the bored to many in a series of weblogs. He failed to mention his own. What is its name?

a) Hoots the archivester
b) i love rachel lucas
c) got lubys
d) Hoots' Blogna

5) Who recently ribbed his ex fellow team member by using the stereotypical and politically incorrect watermelon and fried chicken? And quickly found himself in a heap of trouble. Was it?:

a) Junior Seau
b) Tom Tryon
c) Buster Crabbe
d) Redseniorpicmgr.
e) didacticdaddy

6) Who, if possible, would encourage the PIC to sell cheeseburgers, exclusively? < idea pinched from "It's Just A Fantasy" > Sorry, no chicken tenders.

a) Aristotle Onassis
b) Jackie Bouvier
c) Jay C. Flippen
d) nelore

7) Who wrote "Stray Cat Blues?"

a) Brian Setzer
b) Auric Goldfinger
c) Gram Parsons
d) vietnamcatfish

8) If your health insurance doubles at work what is the best course of action?

a) buy a few more bottles of KY jelly
b) marry a school teacher
c) find another job
d) rent the movie "Goldfinger" at your local blockbuster and ask if they sell lubricants as well.

9) Which process is the most unsanitary?

a) storing raw chicken over cooked foods
b) not washing your hands after using the bathroom
c) discreetly picking your nose after uttering the phrase, "Serve You?"
d) preparing cornbread dressing in a bambareen

10) With talks of bankruptcy, chapter 11 filing, et al what current movie aptly reflects the mood of the denizens of PIC.

a) Cabin Fever
b) Lost in Translation
c) House of the Dead
d) Intolerable Cruelty
e) Mambo Italiano
f) Matchstick Men
g) Louisiana Chainsaw Massacre
h) all of the above

11) What really brought down the PIC as well as the Bosox? < Boston Red Sox >

a) Not selling chicken tenders to kids
b) Too much beef liver and onions
c) curse of the bambino
d) curse of the bambareeno

Farewell and adieu, v.c.

P.S. You may now disembark the nite train. All laborde

P.S.S. And for Alan and his bridge over troubled waters....

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